Sunday, July 31, 2005

sleep is for the weak

Finally, after several days of insomnia and late night shanaegans, I slept for 8 hours.

During my no sleep binge I realized how much life you can fit into a day. Though I felt slightly insane at points, I accomplished quite a bit.

It started somewhere around when Denise left, then my parents left, there was Laurie's birthday, Patrick's birthday, three days of intensives (12 hour days), I finished two books, and then it came to a close with a weekend that merged into one long-ass unending drunken day. Somehow I found myself Bucheon, again, bright and early. This time, sans hula-hoop, but alongside a crazy girl with a bottle of soju poking out of her purse. When I got home I called my mom and then after what seemed like 5 minutes, but was really like 4 hours, I went out and finally met Anna. Beautiful. Still more, too much to do to speak on it now.

Thursday, July 28, 2005

calling all nipples

Last year I taught myself to crochet and started making nipples. I made lots out of little pieces of yarn from other projects. I made cashmere nipples, hand dyed merino wool nipples, smooth silk nipples, fuzzy angora nipples, and even mohair nipples. I couldn't stop and I loved to give them as little gifts. All the cool kids had them.

Now, I wonder... where have all the nipples gone? I want to start a gallery. If you're fabulous, and you know it, and you have one (or two) of my handmade crocheted nipples, take a picture with them (however you like) and email it to me!

And, for a limited time only, if you're interested in getting a crocheted nipple of your own to have and to hold, drop me an email (with your address) and I'll send some miss koco love in the mail. The only catch is that I want pictures of you and the nipples (or you, your lover, and the nipple; or you, and your cat, a dirty toe, and the nipple; or something fun like that) for my archives.

Wednesday, July 27, 2005

returning adoration

Davis... new to the blog world - lowfifantasy.

Hoping to hear(read) amazing thoughts, theories, and memories. I've missed them.

Monday, July 25, 2005

hula hoop

Around quarter to nine on Sunday morning I found myself in Bucheon, buying a hula hoop.

Friday, July 22, 2005

ennui... one of those days

Where are those people who just glow and sparkle? They used to pop up everywhere. On the L train just finishing my favorite book with a smile, in the park posing on a bench in the most perfect light for a breathtaking photo, in front of me at a deli on a late night ordering a peppermint tea and a sandwich that included kimchi and Russian dressing, asking me the most hilarious and cheeky question to get me to talk to them at a house party.

I've been looking for a creative cosmopolite. The perfect someone who is comfortable in their skin and shares a new yorky still down to earth vibe, with just a drop of dorky/geeky/nerdy chic added in. I seek out the people who live their life loud. So much so that all the things they do, believe, and are interested in, simply explodes and rides on the surface of the aura surrounding them, so that you can see (and feel) all that they are, from half a block down the street. And then they still own mystery and so much more beautiful complexity when you actually get to talking. They leave you curious and eager to be a bigger part of their world.

Those were the people who had me checking the missed connections on craig's list, had me hoping that my phone would start vibrating out of control in my pocket, had me dreaming about what they would taste like. Where are they now?

I've developed lackluster crushes here and there, had pointless evenings with a few who I thought had potential... but, now I'm bored. My options for love, relationships, and dating here in Korea just suck. The word of the day explains it all. Whatever it is I'm looking for, I'm pretty sure it's not here. Four weeks till Thailand. Five months till I leave all together. Let the countdown begin.

Word of the Day for Thursday July 21, 2005

ennui \on-WEE\, noun:
A feeling of weariness and dissatisfaction arising from lack
of interest; boredom.

He glanced at his heavily laden bookshelves. Nothing there
appealed to him. The ennui seemed to have settled into his
very bones.
--Amanda Quick, [1]With This Ring

He was often off sick or playing hooky and suffered from a
kind of ennui, a mixture of listlessness and willful
--Elisabeth Roudinesco, [2]Jacques Lacan (translated by
Barbara Bray)

Yet if she felt anything it was ennui,... the grey sky
and the cold wind obliterating every impulse she might have
felt to seek comfort in another climate, another landscape.
--Anita Brookner, [3]Falling Slowly

He was ashamed and unhappy, adrift with a senseless ennui.
--Brian Moynahan, [4]Rasputin: The Saint Who Sinned

Ennui is from the French, from Old French enui, "annoyance,"
from enuier, "to annoy, to bore," from the Latin phrase in
odium, "in hatred or dislike."

Synonyms: tedium, boredom, listlessness, weariness. [5]Find
more at

Tuesday, July 19, 2005

mud festival

Ji, Vickles, and some mud

I went to the mud festival. It felt like the spring break I never had.

What I remember:

trying to stay clean in my hot new bikini
getting muddy
trying to find more mud
posing for pictures
skinny dipping in the sea
pizza with my mom and the crew
skinny dipping in the sea at night (and getting called to shore by some officials)
a fireworks show
bitching out some dude for being a total jerk
making sand sculptures
...a hangover

Good times.

Monday, July 18, 2005


I'm collecting things my students come up with that make me laugh.

For a fun challenge, I asked "What are these called," pointing to my nostrils. My class came up with:

nose hole
nose middle
nose circle
nose open
nose black hole
nose small house(my favorite)
nose hurricane

"I like penis."
I looked at this young boy and replied "You like what?" Not that there's anything wrong with liking penis, but I didn't think that's what he was trying to tell me. It turns out what he meant to say was "peanuts," but couldn't get it out right. He happens to be one of my older students who likes to experiment with profanity. It was an innocent mistake at first, but then he realized what he had said he thought he was hilarious. For the next few classes, he would sneak up to me at a quiet moment and ask how to pronounce it, how to spell it, etc. I kept brushing him off, so then he decided to write me a note. I wasn't quite sure how to respond to this... so, I did nothing.

"Teacher, what is life?"

This student has asked me on several occasions when I will get married, if I have a boyfriend, and if he is Korean, etc. on many occasions. She's very concerned about my love life. I really like her, and if it weren't for the fact that she's 11, my student, and has very low level English speaking abilities, I'd dish. She's totally the type that I could have some serious girl talk with and I bet she would have some insightful input.

This was not from one of my students, but I loved it so much I made a copy for myself. It's by Princess Elizabeth Bictoria Cornsalad Bnana hammer (we let them choose and change their English names).

This project was about protecting and saving the environment. NOTICE: It's a kitchen knife. How funny is that?!?

Anyway... I often have students write sentences on the board for the vocabulary words while I walk around and check homework. Then we look at the sentences together and correct the mistakes. The following are exactly what was written on the board. Keep in mind that most of my students are between 9 and 11 years old.

He's married a woman young enough to be his daughter. -Suzie

I have a valuable a guns and poop. -Max

Jack steals my balls!

I love being a teacher. At this point all of my students properly and regularly use fabulous in conversation (and in their writing as well). I insisted that one of my senior classes requests to go get water by using the phrase "Teacher, may I hydrate myself," or "Teacher, I need H20." Recently, I taught one class absolutely fabulous as well as DUH! I'm also giving them lessons in fabulousness, here are some of my up and coming divas and strong women playing with my sunglasses.

Wednesday, July 13, 2005

oh dear

Last night I passed out right after work. It's about 6AM now. I've been up, without being able to go back to sleep, since four. For the first time in Korea, there was a mosquito in my apartment. It bit my left thigh. It repeatedly buzzed near my ear. I was sleepily convinced that I had gotten it that last time and now I could go to sleep. I tried putting a pillow over my head, curling into the sheets, snuggling my body next to a pillow, covering all exposed body parts. Nothing helped. I hate mosquitoes. The universe was telling me something. So, I got up and cleaned my kitchen. Emptied my fridge. I did a load of laundry. I took out my garbage. I went to the store. The countdown has begun.

My parents will be here in 24 hours. The new Harry Potter comes out in 3 days. Denise leaves Korea in 2 weeks. Intensives (9 hours of teaching for a month) start the day after. I go to Thailand in a month and a half.

I feel like when I return from vacation in September, I'm going to be on the home stretch of this contract, and most likely my time in Korea. With my parents coming I feel like this rollercoaster is reaching it's peak. I better hold on and enjoy the ride while it lasts, right? Meanwhile, I better figure out what I'm going to do next.

In other news, oh yes, SWEET BUNS!

sweet buns

Monday, July 11, 2005

a piece of beauty


I particularly enjoyed the last bit:

So today, a cloudy Sunday, I find myself rising at a quarter to three in the afternoon and going straight for my very tempermental laptop. I wanted to write before food, before coffee, before a shower...

"I love you." Such meaningless words. The biggest lie ever perpetuated. And it is perpetuated, no? Ad infinitum...

"I do love you. I have a special kind of love for you. The kind of love that evaporates whenever you leave the room."

I'm gonna eat and get drunk again.


Sunday, July 10, 2005

bottled dreams


I found perfect little bottles today to hold my dreams. mmmmm...


Friday, July 08, 2005

body marks

One of the new Korean members of our staff told me recently, "you have something, right there," as he motioned to his lip. I start wiping the corner of my mouth, imagining that a piece of some tasty little snack was lingering on my face.
"Did I get it?" I asked.
"No. You have something on your lip," he replied and pointed.
"How about now?"
"There is a thing on your lip. It is very strange."

Okay, so there I was in the middle of our second conversation EVER, and he's pointing out that I have a freckle on my lip.

there it is

freckle again
and here it is again. SO WHAT!

He's not the first person to ever point out that I have a unique freckle on my lip, but come on, I don't know you. I might alsonote that I'm not going to be the first person to say that this dude is weird. It's not a cultural barrier thing here, HE'S STRANGE. So, then I say to him, "WHAT? You mean my FRECKLE!?! Yeah, that's my skin." Then I punched him, in a friendly way, and told him "Stop being weird."

What I should have told our new staff member was "Well... not only do I have a freckle on my lip but I also have a portal to another dimension on my ass. You wanna see?"

I do though. It's true. Don't believe me? Here it is:

This incident with the weirdo has made me think about the little marks people have on their bodies. Last night, over some peach soju, I was discussing scars, particularly ones on your head. I have one from the three stitches I got after slipping at ballet school and busting open my head. I was chasing another little girl and hit my head on a marble table. OUCH! At 21, I shaved my head and the scar showed. I felt so badass. I love the stories that go with body marks. Tattoo stories are good too.

gotta good body mark tale? I'd love to hear about/see it? drop me an email or post a comment.

And I'm loving...

fashion photography

pamela reed




Wednesday, July 06, 2005


Alex Rodriguez

In the middle of my grammar lesson, one of my students, out of the blue, asked me "Teacher, do you know Alex Rodriguez?"

A wave of heat rushed over me, followed by chills. Bizarre, romantic, and totally fun memories of New York instantly filled my head. Dancing in his dorm room while Christmas lights shifted from red to blue to green, inspiring trips to museums, playing on the beach on L.I., making things in my apartment downtown, climbing out his window, laying in the sun in the Botanical Garden, chilling in Harlem drinking beers by candlelight, laying in the tent pitched in my living room nude. I stopped and so did everything else. I haven't heard that name in... so long.

"HOW DO YOU [a 12-year-old Korean kid] KNOW ALEX RODRIGUEZ?!?"
"He's my friend from Philadelphia."

As it turns out my student knows a different Alex than I did years ago. He knows a 13-year-old boy who coincidentally lives in my hometown--not the brilliant, sexy, creative, Columbian guy (who owned a sewing machine and knew how to use it) that I once adored.

It was so strange to hear his name, to think of him unexpectedly, and I missed him for the first time in so long (just as he told me I would). I wondered if at that moment something had shifted in the cosmos and he was somehow thinking of me too.

Wow. Alejandro... where did you disappear to?

Monday, July 04, 2005


Ji and Phil had a house warming/wedding/double b-day party at their place. Last weekend I discovered their thier amazing friend Ian and I were born on the same day, same year too. WHAT FUN! Their cute apartment was packed with people and it felt like a sauna, but everyone stayed so late it was early. It was really nice to share my birthday with someone and I ended up getting more than I expected and all the things I wanted (except for that RuPaul doll, but it's all good). All in all, so far so good for 26.

Saturday, July 02, 2005


I shared Friday with Paul and the rest of my co-workers at a bar. It's Paul's birthday too. Actually his is on the 4th, but he was born in Papua New Guinea, so we figure we were born on the same day. Our boss treated the staff to drinks, side dishes galore, and bought a cake too. We had fun and got a chance to chat with some of the new staff. At one point in the evening they had some live music and that was funny to watch.

I drank enough that many of the conversations I had seem a bit fuzzy now, but I do remember the bathroom and the decor. I was so taken by the place, I did a whole photo shoot. I'm laughing at myself, feel free to laugh at me too.

Fist of all, it was a unisex bathroom. To enter the bathroom you had to go through a beaded curtain. Right before the bathroom there was a little piece of artwork of two women. Once you enter there was a urinal and across from that was the sink. Thus, if you're a woman you run the risk of walking into the bathroom to find some man taking care of his business and you have to pass him to get to the stall.

The guys kept making jokes that the women's bathroom stall was like paradise, in comparison to the men's area, because we had a candle and flowers... I don't know, it was still a bar bathroom.

The best part of the bathroom was the crazy, dirty, funny sign above the urinal. The first thing that came to my mind was "who takes a poo in a urinal?" One of my co-workers really wanted to jack the sign, but apparently it was attached with some kind of serious caulk or something. At least they ask nicely ("Please").

On the wall outside were some other framed pieces I enjoyed:

One of the many nudes on the way to the bathroom.

Miles says "Stop talking Nicole. Shhhhh"

Friday, July 01, 2005

Dog shit girl

Only in Korea. Some woman's dog takes a poo on the subway. People took pictures and now it's hot news all over the net, including on BoingBoing. Funny stuff.

I can't get over the dogs here. They are living accessories. First of all most are purse sized and if they don't have on a puma or adidas outfit, 8 times out of 10 their owner dyed their ears pink. I don't get it.

In other news, it's monsoon season here. This country has such extreme weather. Artic winds blow through here in the winter, yellow dust from china in the spring, summers are hot and humid with monsoons thrown in the middle. Just moments ago, out of nowhere, it started pouring. Just absolutely pouring with lightning and everything. Now, 3 minutes later it stopped completely. Strange.